1 00:00:04,480 --> 00:00:06,560 Not 2 00:00:06,760 --> 00:00:14,760 ... 3 00:00:16,520 --> 00:00:18,520 moody music 4 00:00:18,720 --> 00:00:26,720 ... 5 00:00:37,560 --> 00:00:44,920 ... 6 00:00:45,240 --> 00:00:47,000 Door opening 7 00:01:06,800 --> 00:01:10,080 -Excuse me. I am an architect currently unemployed. 8 00:01:10,280 --> 00:01:11,840 Do I have to fill all this out? 9 00:01:12,040 --> 00:01:14,040 -Uh... Yes. It seems to me so. 10 00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:15,840 - All right. THANKS. - It was nothing. 11 00:01:16,120 --> 00:01:17,120 Pardon. 12 00:01:18,680 --> 00:01:21,160 Excuse me. 13 00:01:26,680 --> 00:01:28,840 -Mr. Simon Meijer! 14 00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:30,480 Is there a Mr. Meijer? 15 00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:32,480 - I am here. - Come over here. 16 00:01:38,880 --> 00:01:41,000 Good morning. Please follow me. 17 00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:44,240 Excuse me. You can enter. 18 00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:55,200 -Hi, Etty. 19 00:01:56,720 --> 00:01:58,840 Are you doing well ? Wait a minute. 20 00:01:59,040 --> 00:02:01,360 You can bring special requests 21 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:02,920 to Dr. Bamberger? 22 00:02:03,920 --> 00:02:05,280 -Yes. I'll take care of it. 23 00:02:05,480 --> 00:02:07,600 -And tell him that it will also be necessary 24 00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:09,960 that he cancels one of his approvals. 25 00:02:12,640 --> 00:02:14,560 -Yes. I will pass it on to him. 26 00:02:15,480 --> 00:02:18,760 -Unfortunately, sometimes, we can't do anything, 27 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:21,000 but it would be even worse, without us. 28 00:02:22,840 --> 00:02:23,840 -Yes. 29 00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:34,600 “It’s a huge disaster. 30 00:02:34,800 --> 00:02:36,040 “Foul. 31 00:02:40,320 --> 00:02:43,040 "Later, history will have to judge. 32 00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:50,120 "But it will never be possible to repair the fact 33 00:02:50,440 --> 00:02:52,120 "only part of the population collaborated 34 00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:54,120 "to deport the majority. 35 00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:02,720 "I am grateful to you, my God, 36 00:03:02,920 --> 00:03:06,320 "for not leaving me sit behind a desk 37 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,960 "but for having placed me at the heart of this suffering 38 00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:11,200 "and the torments of our time. 39 00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:15,880 "But will I be able to hold on for a long time?" 40 00:03:16,200 --> 00:03:24,200 ... 41 00:03:31,040 --> 00:03:33,000 -GOOD. Continue. 42 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:35,680 Cough, please. 43 00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:37,880 Cough 44 00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:39,080 ... 45 00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:41,320 Yes. GOOD. THANKS. 46 00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:43,680 You can get dressed. 47 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:46,880 I think it's pneumonia. 48 00:03:47,680 --> 00:03:49,800 I will prescribe antibiotics. 49 00:03:50,800 --> 00:03:52,080 In the meantime, 50 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:53,680 here are some tablets. 51 00:03:55,080 --> 00:03:56,160 It will be better in 3 days. 52 00:03:56,480 --> 00:03:58,280 Otherwise, come back to me. 53 00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:00,080 Cough 54 00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:01,280 I can do 55 00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:03,880 postpone his deportation of a week. 56 00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:08,720 -And you could send him to the hospital? 57 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:13,400 -Certainly not. This is totally exaggerated. 58 00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:17,240 I'll be better in a few days. - That's not the question. 59 00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:19,960 The Council said that people hospitalized 60 00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:21,600 would not be deported. 61 00:04:22,320 --> 00:04:23,880 -But since then, the hospital is saturated. 62 00:04:24,840 --> 00:04:27,280 -But my brother Jaap works there. 63 00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:29,400 -He won't find a place. 64 00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:38,280 -Not even with a letter from you? 65 00:04:44,880 --> 00:04:47,960 -GOOD. I'm going to do this, but you will have to accompany him. 66 00:04:48,280 --> 00:04:51,000 - Yes. Of course. - Go there tonight. All right ? 67 00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:54,240 Before curfew. There are fewer people. 68 00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:02,080 - Thank you. - It was nothing. 69 00:05:08,160 --> 00:05:10,160 Melancholic music 70 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:15,000 ... 71 00:05:15,200 --> 00:05:16,200 -You know, 72 00:05:16,360 --> 00:05:19,040 I have to admit 73 00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:21,360 that I have become very accustomed to to you. 74 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:28,240 -And me too, Julius. 75 00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:35,200 Cough 76 00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:37,800 ... 77 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:40,320 "Only I know how 78 00:05:40,520 --> 00:05:42,640 "I became terribly attached to him, 79 00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:45,720 "with what intensity 80 00:05:46,320 --> 00:05:49,160 "with what dedication I integrated this man into myself, 81 00:05:49,360 --> 00:05:51,000 "his work and his life. 82 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:54,160 “He is an integral part of me. 83 00:05:56,280 --> 00:05:58,560 “Fortunately, I can still be with him, 84 00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:00,840 "even if it's only 5 minutes per day. 85 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:03,480 "The greatest danger, 86 00:06:04,960 --> 00:06:07,800 "it's just my heart breaks with love for him." 87 00:06:10,720 --> 00:06:11,720 -Etty? 88 00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:15,440 Are you listening to me? 89 00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:20,000 -Yes. Sorry. I was lost in my thoughts. 90 00:06:20,640 --> 00:06:22,520 -It looks like you're somewhere else. 91 00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:26,360 -No. I am here, with you. 92 00:06:26,680 --> 00:06:29,120 Cough 93 00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,080 ... 94 00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:34,960 -Come. Let's go get something to drink. 95 00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:38,600 -The curfew will begin. 96 00:06:39,360 --> 00:06:42,760 We have to be at the hospital first. - Please. 5 minutes. 97 00:06:48,680 --> 00:06:50,520 Knocks on the door 98 00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:56,400 -Hi. Come in. Quickly. 99 00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:15,720 Are you okay? 100 00:07:16,680 --> 00:07:18,080 Acquiescence 101 00:07:19,440 --> 00:07:21,360 I know this expression. 102 00:07:22,320 --> 00:07:24,520 You are in the process to cook something. 103 00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:26,240 -No. It's just... 104 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:28,800 -You are afraid that I'm trying to stop you. 105 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:32,040 -What? What are you talking about ? 106 00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:35,880 -But there is no one in the world who could stop you. 107 00:07:38,080 --> 00:07:39,400 Not even me. 108 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,360 You are unstoppable. 109 00:07:54,880 --> 00:07:56,560 -I love you so much. 110 00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:04,640 Crying 111 00:08:04,840 --> 00:08:12,280 ... 112 00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:13,600 -Yes. 113 00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:17,040 Me too. 114 00:08:22,120 --> 00:08:23,160 But... 115 00:08:24,520 --> 00:08:26,080 I have always been convinced 116 00:08:26,280 --> 00:08:28,800 that our history would only be a prelude 117 00:08:29,280 --> 00:08:31,640 to your true great love. 118 00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:33,880 -Don't say that. 119 00:08:46,920 --> 00:08:48,240 Cough 120 00:08:51,440 --> 00:08:52,440 Jaap! 121 00:08:52,560 --> 00:08:53,560 Hi. 122 00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:55,360 -You're late. 123 00:08:56,120 --> 00:08:57,520 -Yes. Sorry. 124 00:08:57,720 --> 00:08:58,800 THANKS. 125 00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:02,640 Jaap, this is Julius. Julius Spier. You surely heard 126 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:04,080 talk about him. 127 00:09:04,400 --> 00:09:07,360 -Yes. He's your lover. Nice to meet you. 128 00:09:07,680 --> 00:09:10,760 - Why do we always have to... - I am flattered by this title. 129 00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:12,480 Delighted. 130 00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:18,560 - Do you have Bamberger's letter? - Yes. One second. 131 00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:20,840 Are you letting us in? 132 00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:22,680 -You can't. 133 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,240 - For what ? - Visiting time is over. 134 00:09:26,560 --> 00:09:28,680 -I want to be sure that they accept it. 135 00:09:28,880 --> 00:09:32,000 -I took care of it. I spoke to the right people. 136 00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:33,440 Don't worry. 137 00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:35,800 -I'll accompany you a little. All right ? 138 00:09:36,680 --> 00:09:37,680 -These are the rules. 139 00:09:37,920 --> 00:09:39,000 -I know, but... 140 00:09:39,320 --> 00:09:40,680 -Come home. 141 00:09:41,920 --> 00:09:43,280 Please. 142 00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:48,360 -Yes. THANKS. 143 00:09:51,760 --> 00:09:53,240 Thank you, Jaap. 144 00:09:56,720 --> 00:09:58,160 I'm coming to see you tomorrow. 145 00:09:58,360 --> 00:09:59,440 -I'll be there. 146 00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:18,760 Melancholic music 147 00:10:18,960 --> 00:10:26,960 ... 148 00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:34,200 -"'A prelude to a truly great love.' 149 00:10:35,880 --> 00:10:38,000 “It pains me immensely, 150 00:10:38,200 --> 00:10:40,360 “but he’s right. 151 00:10:43,160 --> 00:10:46,360 "I always said 'I can handle anything', 152 00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:49,360 "but if it happened to him something, 153 00:10:49,560 --> 00:10:51,440 "or if I had to separate myself from him, 154 00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:53,640 “I couldn’t continue. 155 00:10:55,720 --> 00:10:57,360 "In spite of everything, I must let him go 156 00:10:58,960 --> 00:11:00,120 "and move forward." 157 00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:02,320 Melancholic music 158 00:11:02,520 --> 00:11:10,520 ... 159 00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:17,480 "I have to make sure 160 00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:20,240 "that my attachment to him 161 00:11:20,560 --> 00:11:23,920 "don't consume me to the point of leaving me without strength. 162 00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:29,280 “That would be selfish. 163 00:11:32,280 --> 00:11:33,280 "On the contrary, 164 00:11:33,520 --> 00:11:34,880 "of my love for him, 165 00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:38,480 "I must draw strength for all those who need it, 166 00:11:40,520 --> 00:11:42,760 "because with all the love that I experience, 167 00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:45,560 "I can feed myself and feed others 168 00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:47,640 "for the rest of my life. 169 00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:56,520 "My God, 170 00:11:57,920 --> 00:12:00,920 "all my links are slipping little by little from my shoulders, 171 00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:05,920 "with infinite delicacy, 172 00:12:06,880 --> 00:12:08,560 "a great melancholy 173 00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:12,080 "but also with the certainty that it is in the order of things 174 00:12:12,280 --> 00:12:14,320 "and that this cannot be otherwise. 175 00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:17,280 "I let go, 176 00:12:18,720 --> 00:12:19,960 “day after day.” 177 00:12:32,480 --> 00:12:33,480 -Etty? 178 00:12:37,280 --> 00:12:38,640 -Hannah! 179 00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:47,120 Nice hat, your hat. 180 00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:56,040 - Everything except lice. - What happened to you? 181 00:12:56,360 --> 00:12:59,800 -We're going to camp tomorrow. They revoked my exemption yesterday. 182 00:13:19,440 --> 00:13:20,840 -Know that... 183 00:13:21,480 --> 00:13:22,960 you're still so pretty. 184 00:13:23,560 --> 00:13:24,640 -Thank you. 185 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:27,600 I'm coming to say goodbye to you. 186 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:29,760 It was on my list things to do. 187 00:13:31,600 --> 00:13:33,840 -If you hadn't done it, I would have wanted you. 188 00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:38,480 How... 189 00:13:39,680 --> 00:13:41,600 How do you feel? - I don't feel anything. 190 00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:44,720 I don't want to feel anything anymore. 191 00:13:45,840 --> 00:13:47,360 -I understand you, Hannah. 192 00:13:47,680 --> 00:13:50,640 -I'm going to die. How important to feel something? 193 00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:52,200 -You're not going to die. 194 00:13:52,680 --> 00:13:54,280 It will be tough, the camp, but... 195 00:13:54,600 --> 00:13:55,840 -Etty! 196 00:13:58,240 --> 00:13:59,400 -Yes. I'm coming ! 197 00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:01,320 -Say “hello” to him. 198 00:14:09,360 --> 00:14:10,360 THANKS. 199 00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:20,400 ... 200 00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:45,760 -They started deportations to the east 201 00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:47,400 from Westerbork. 202 00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:51,680 Probably towards a work camp in Germany. 203 00:14:57,200 --> 00:14:59,320 The 1st train left today. 204 00:15:02,400 --> 00:15:03,880 More than a thousand people. 205 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:12,040 I have to go there tomorrow 206 00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:14,480 to help them to set up a dispensary. 207 00:15:14,680 --> 00:15:17,760 They will be able to deliver on-site exemptions. 208 00:15:19,320 --> 00:15:22,240 They also want create a branch of the Jewish Council 209 00:15:22,440 --> 00:15:25,040 where some of us will be able to work, 210 00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:28,480 mission for which 211 00:15:29,600 --> 00:15:31,480 this Tobias had the nerve to ask me 212 00:15:31,680 --> 00:15:33,640 if I wanted to volunteer. 213 00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:35,320 But yes. Of course. 214 00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:38,760 You just have to go there yourself, dirty corrupt. 215 00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:44,320 Well, anyway. I won't be there tomorrow. 216 00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:48,480 I asked a friend, Dr. Sanders, to replace me. 217 00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:51,600 Help him with the paperwork. 218 00:15:53,880 --> 00:15:55,520 We'll meet inside. 219 00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,760 The door opens. 220 00:15:59,360 --> 00:16:00,800 Closure 221 00:16:02,720 --> 00:16:04,720 Dreary music 222 00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:12,920 ... 223 00:16:56,600 --> 00:17:04,600 ... 224 00:17:37,160 --> 00:17:38,200 Not 225 00:17:40,320 --> 00:17:41,560 -Hi, Hans. 226 00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:43,960 Are you up yet? - Yes. 227 00:17:44,440 --> 00:17:46,480 I'm going on a trip with friends. 228 00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:48,680 And you ? 229 00:17:50,640 --> 00:17:52,040 -I just woke up. 230 00:17:55,720 --> 00:17:56,720 -Do you want it? 231 00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:00,320 -No. I just wanted to see 232 00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:03,600 if I had more strength, with everything I walk. 233 00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:08,360 -Keep it, if you want. 234 00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:11,080 I'll find another one. 235 00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:14,200 -No. It's good. 236 00:18:15,440 --> 00:18:17,720 Thanks, Hans. That's nice. 237 00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:22,880 -Tell me if I can do something for you. 238 00:18:24,840 --> 00:18:25,840 All right ? 239 00:18:27,080 --> 00:18:29,120 -Yes. I'll tell you. 240 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:32,080 THANKS. 241 00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:37,760 -Uh... 242 00:18:38,520 --> 00:18:39,520 -What? 243 00:18:40,080 --> 00:18:41,080 Tell me. 244 00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:44,480 -No. Excuse me. It's nothing. 245 00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:49,280 Door slam 246 00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:51,480 Gloomy and tormented music 247 00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:59,680 ... 248 00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:35,200 Feverish breathing 249 00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:43,400 ... 250 00:19:55,680 --> 00:20:03,680 ... 251 00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:17,240 -Ticket, please. 252 00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:18,440 THANKS. 253 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:25,320 Ticket, please. 254 00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:29,040 Thank you. 255 00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:34,280 Your ticket. 256 00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:37,080 GOOD. THANKS. 257 00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:49,480 Your pass 258 00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:51,480 to leave Amsterdam, do you have it? 259 00:20:54,760 --> 00:20:56,240 -Yes. 260 00:21:10,440 --> 00:21:11,440 I have a question. 261 00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:16,960 How do you know Do I need a pass? 262 00:21:18,120 --> 00:21:20,120 -Let's say that it’s part of the job. 263 00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:23,080 Observe people, pay attention to details... 264 00:21:23,280 --> 00:21:24,680 I'm good at that. 265 00:21:25,920 --> 00:21:26,960 It's good. 266 00:21:29,120 --> 00:21:30,120 Have a good trip. 267 00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:39,840 ♪ Loudspeaker announcement 268 00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:42,040 ♪ -Next stop: Hilversum. 269 00:21:42,240 --> 00:21:44,320 I repeat: Hilversum. 270 00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:05,680 Knocks on the door 271 00:22:13,960 --> 00:22:14,960 -Etty... 272 00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:23,720 I was convinced that you wouldn't come. 273 00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:24,960 -For what ? 274 00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:26,160 -I don't know. 275 00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:28,840 I didn't believe it. That's all. 276 00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:31,560 I'm taking you to the basement. 277 00:22:35,240 --> 00:22:36,960 -I love this house. 278 00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:39,920 -It's nice. 279 00:22:42,480 --> 00:22:43,520 Follow me. 280 00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:53,240 Watch out for the head. 281 00:23:09,120 --> 00:23:10,120 -Oh ! 282 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:12,960 You made yourself a real studio. 283 00:23:13,160 --> 00:23:14,160 -Yes. 284 00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:17,240 -Register yourself the whole show here? 285 00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:19,760 Are the guests moving? 286 00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:21,800 -Yes. In recent months, anyway. 287 00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:23,840 -Why don't you do that? at the Vara? 288 00:23:24,040 --> 00:23:25,320 -We are better here. 289 00:23:28,360 --> 00:23:30,680 -I really like it how you arranged it. 290 00:23:30,880 --> 00:23:32,200 When did you do that? 291 00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:34,840 -Recently. There are even toilets. 292 00:23:35,160 --> 00:23:36,480 There is a shower. 293 00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:38,840 -It's great. 294 00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:41,080 -Yes. 295 00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:45,440 -What ? 296 00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:51,320 -I thought it might make a good hiding place for you. 297 00:23:54,160 --> 00:23:55,640 No one ever comes. 298 00:23:58,240 --> 00:23:59,240 You could stay 299 00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:00,720 time to find a solution. 300 00:24:09,440 --> 00:24:10,840 -I want you to keep them, 301 00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:18,520 when we are finished, 302 00:24:21,840 --> 00:24:23,080 because... 303 00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:29,480 I'm going to Westerbork 304 00:24:30,480 --> 00:24:32,480 and I don't want to take them. 305 00:24:37,840 --> 00:24:41,000 -But I don't understand. You work at the Council. 306 00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:42,200 You are not exempt 307 00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:44,000 deportation? - Yes. 308 00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:46,240 But I asked 309 00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:49,920 to be transferred to the office which will open in the camp 310 00:24:50,520 --> 00:24:53,320 to offer support psychological and physical 311 00:24:53,520 --> 00:24:54,680 to the deportees. 312 00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:58,680 I can give them a lot. 313 00:25:10,800 --> 00:25:12,160 -When do you have to leave? 314 00:25:13,520 --> 00:25:14,520 -Soon. 315 00:25:16,520 --> 00:25:18,360 I'm waiting for validation, but... 316 00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:23,960 it shouldn't be long, since there are no volunteers. 317 00:25:24,280 --> 00:25:27,480 - There's probably a good reason. - Yes. Maybe. 318 00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:31,160 -And Gemmeker can at any time withdraw your employee status 319 00:25:31,360 --> 00:25:32,880 and put you on the train. 320 00:25:33,080 --> 00:25:34,640 -It's a possibility. 321 00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:37,120 I hope not, but it's possible. 322 00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:41,640 Nobody knows what awaits us, 323 00:25:41,960 --> 00:25:44,440 then we can't do anything else 324 00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:47,560 that continue to move forward by doing 325 00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:51,640 which seems to us to be right. 326 00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:02,360 -And who else knows of your plan? 327 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:04,200 -Person. 328 00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:07,600 Max will find out, reading my letter. 329 00:26:08,520 --> 00:26:10,520 -Max Polak? He will never approve. 330 00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:13,840 -I sent 2 copies to Cohen and Asscher. 331 00:26:14,920 --> 00:26:17,360 They are looking for volunteers, so... 332 00:26:18,920 --> 00:26:21,240 They will approve. That's for sure. 333 00:26:25,120 --> 00:26:26,120 So... 334 00:26:26,960 --> 00:26:29,120 for the moment, you're the only one who knows 335 00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:34,240 and I want it to stay like that until I leave. All right ? 336 00:26:36,560 --> 00:26:38,720 Can I trust you? 337 00:26:42,520 --> 00:26:43,520 -Yes. 338 00:26:43,680 --> 00:26:45,480 And Han, don't you want to tell him? 339 00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:47,480 And your family? 340 00:26:47,520 --> 00:26:50,120 -I'll let them know when everything is settled. 341 00:26:55,560 --> 00:26:56,560 Klaas, 342 00:26:57,920 --> 00:26:59,000 I came to see you 343 00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:01,360 because you alone can understand me. 344 00:27:01,560 --> 00:27:03,560 You are the only one who would do the same thing. 345 00:27:03,880 --> 00:27:04,880 -You are wrong. 346 00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:06,080 -Promise me. 347 00:27:06,360 --> 00:27:08,976 - I could never do that. - Of course it is. 348 00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:11,200 -I wouldn't have the strength, now. 349 00:27:12,400 --> 00:27:13,520 -How so ? 350 00:27:16,560 --> 00:27:19,240 -I started working for national radio. 351 00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:25,040 Yes. You heard right. For these fascist trash. 352 00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:29,800 I'm not the only one, of course. I know that's not an excuse. 353 00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:32,800 I don't make propaganda, of course. 354 00:27:34,400 --> 00:27:37,200 That doesn't excuse anything either. - So what do we record? 355 00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:40,720 -I continue to record my own mission, 356 00:27:41,800 --> 00:27:43,920 to preserve a semblance of dignity. 357 00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:50,880 But I don't even know if it will be broadcast one day, 358 00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:52,200 even less where. 359 00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:55,440 Maybe after the war. 360 00:27:59,920 --> 00:28:01,160 Sigh 361 00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:05,400 To be completely honest, Etty, 362 00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:09,240 I'm just scared. 363 00:28:11,520 --> 00:28:13,120 I want to survive. 364 00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:21,720 You can call me a collaborator. I would understand. 365 00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:24,080 - I'm not judging you. - You would have the right. 366 00:28:24,280 --> 00:28:27,920 -I just want to know if I can trust you, 367 00:28:30,320 --> 00:28:32,600 if what I told you will remain between us. 368 00:28:32,800 --> 00:28:33,960 Give me your word. 369 00:28:39,240 --> 00:28:40,280 -Yes. 370 00:28:47,120 --> 00:28:49,160 Finger snaps 371 00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:51,440 Engagement 372 00:28:58,800 --> 00:28:59,800 -Hello, 373 00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:01,280 listeners of the future 374 00:29:01,480 --> 00:29:04,640 who you find in this new era of freedom. 375 00:29:05,440 --> 00:29:07,760 Welcome to this episode from “The Red Line”. 376 00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:09,920 We are in company 377 00:29:10,240 --> 00:29:11,880 by writer Etty Hillesum. 378 00:29:12,080 --> 00:29:14,920 His work has not yet been published, 379 00:29:15,120 --> 00:29:18,640 but I am convinced that when you hear his words, 380 00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:20,520 Etty will have become 381 00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:23,680 one of the most important voices. 382 00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:25,080 -Klaas! 383 00:29:26,920 --> 00:29:28,400 -She has been writing for a year 384 00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:30,880 a sort of diary, 385 00:29:31,200 --> 00:29:33,640 texts which resemble memories. 386 00:29:33,840 --> 00:29:35,680 It is above all a question 387 00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:38,840 of a testimony of depth... 388 00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:41,400 - Klaas, stop a little. - You're right. 389 00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:43,880 Let's get started. We listen to you. 390 00:29:52,760 --> 00:29:53,880 -So... 391 00:29:55,080 --> 00:29:56,680 Where should I start? 392 00:29:57,920 --> 00:29:58,920 -From the beginning. 393 00:30:03,800 --> 00:30:05,200 Throat clearing 394 00:30:06,880 --> 00:30:08,840 -Okay. This is the very beginning. 395 00:30:17,200 --> 00:30:18,440 “Well, let’s go. 396 00:30:20,080 --> 00:30:21,120 “Painful moment 397 00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:23,920 "and almost insurmountable for me. 398 00:30:24,840 --> 00:30:26,560 “Overcome my reluctance 399 00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:28,840 "and deliver me to a piece of paper. 400 00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:33,040 “So much inhibition. I don't dare express things, 401 00:30:33,880 --> 00:30:35,600 “let them flow. 402 00:30:35,920 --> 00:30:36,960 "It will be necessary, however, 403 00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:40,440 "if I want to give my life a reasonable course." 404 00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:44,120 Dreary music 405 00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:52,320 ... 406 00:31:09,960 --> 00:31:11,280 "To Mr. Max Polak, 407 00:31:11,600 --> 00:31:13,280 "responsible for exemptions. 408 00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:19,840 "Hereby, I request my transfer 409 00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:22,400 "at the office of the Jewish Council from Westerbork. 410 00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:30,720 "My skills could be more useful 411 00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:32,440 "in social support 412 00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:35,040 “people arriving at the camp.” 413 00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:39,560 -Etty? 414 00:31:44,680 --> 00:31:46,040 -"I am aware 415 00:31:46,360 --> 00:31:48,240 "risks inherent to this position 416 00:31:48,440 --> 00:31:50,960 "and irreversible sides of this decision." 417 00:31:51,160 --> 00:31:53,360 Dreary music 418 00:31:53,680 --> 00:32:01,680 ... 419 00:32:03,240 --> 00:32:05,680 "If I may a poetic note, 420 00:32:06,320 --> 00:32:08,600 "we all share a common destiny 421 00:32:10,000 --> 00:32:12,360 “and I want to take responsibility for my part. 422 00:32:13,880 --> 00:32:16,760 "I want to strap it on my back like a little package 423 00:32:16,960 --> 00:32:18,840 "by squeezing it stronger and stronger 424 00:32:19,040 --> 00:32:21,080 "until he was part of me. 425 00:32:22,400 --> 00:32:24,480 "This is what will guide me wherever I go 426 00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:26,160 "from now on. 427 00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:28,440 "If my request is rejected, 428 00:32:28,640 --> 00:32:31,120 "I will resign from my position on the Council. 429 00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:33,600 "I will give up to my privileged status 430 00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:36,560 "and will wait for my summons for Westerbork. 431 00:32:37,400 --> 00:32:39,520 "With my regards respectful. 432 00:32:39,720 --> 00:32:41,160 “Etty Hillesum.” 433 00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:43,720 Ringtone 434 00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:45,240 You're not picking up? 435 00:32:45,560 --> 00:32:47,440 -Not while we're recording. 436 00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:51,920 You can continue. 437 00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:55,680 Or maybe you want take a break? 438 00:32:56,000 --> 00:32:57,600 -No. We're almost done. 439 00:32:59,240 --> 00:33:00,240 -Okay. 440 00:33:00,920 --> 00:33:02,440 It's good. You can go there. 441 00:33:07,040 --> 00:33:08,040 -It's... 442 00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:11,720 It's the last one. 443 00:33:15,320 --> 00:33:16,320 "My God, 444 00:33:18,280 --> 00:33:20,600 "all my links are slipping from my shoulders 445 00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:25,600 "with infinite delicacy, 446 00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:29,320 "a great melancholy but also with certainty 447 00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:30,760 "that it's in order 448 00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:33,640 "things, that it cannot be otherwise. 449 00:33:35,640 --> 00:33:36,800 "I let go, 450 00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:39,800 “day after day.” 451 00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:52,800 It's over. 452 00:34:00,600 --> 00:34:02,160 I wrote this last night. 453 00:34:09,240 --> 00:34:10,520 They are yours. 454 00:34:14,760 --> 00:34:17,360 We could pass one last piece, 455 00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:18,600 as a conclusion? 456 00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:21,760 -We have time. We can continue. 457 00:34:23,720 --> 00:34:24,720 -I have to go back. 458 00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:34,280 -Dear listeners, 459 00:34:34,600 --> 00:34:36,640 We will offer you a... 460 00:34:38,520 --> 00:34:41,080 a musical break. What have you brought us? 461 00:34:43,960 --> 00:34:46,280 -A Russian lullaby that my mother sang to me 462 00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:47,560 to fall asleep. 463 00:34:52,080 --> 00:34:53,080 -Alright. 464 00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:00,440 Crackling vinyl record 465 00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:05,160 ♪ Sweet song in Russian 466 00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:13,360 ... 467 00:35:38,120 --> 00:35:39,640 -What is she talking about? 468 00:35:43,960 --> 00:35:45,680 -She speaks... 469 00:35:47,640 --> 00:35:50,120 of a mother who tries to tell his son 470 00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:52,440 that his father died in the war. 471 00:35:57,880 --> 00:35:59,000 "There was sorrow 472 00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:02,000 "and... 473 00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:04,080 “There will always be some. 474 00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:09,560 “Sorrow is eternal.” 475 00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:14,040 -Okay. Is that a lullaby? 476 00:36:16,680 --> 00:36:18,400 You Russians are weird. 477 00:36:18,600 --> 00:36:21,480 -Actually, I find that it makes complete sense, 478 00:36:21,800 --> 00:36:23,480 nowadays. 479 00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:24,680 -Oh yes? 480 00:36:27,080 --> 00:36:28,360 How's that? 481 00:36:29,400 --> 00:36:30,800 -In the West, we don't see 482 00:36:31,120 --> 00:36:33,680 suffering as a part of life. 483 00:36:34,000 --> 00:36:36,600 - No. - And when it falls on us, 484 00:36:36,920 --> 00:36:38,720 we are not at all... 485 00:36:38,920 --> 00:36:40,360 not prepared at all. 486 00:36:41,480 --> 00:36:43,240 We are very inexperienced 487 00:36:44,960 --> 00:36:47,720 in what is the art of suffering. 488 00:36:48,040 --> 00:36:50,440 Do you see what I mean? - No. 489 00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:53,840 What do you call the art of suffering? 490 00:36:55,080 --> 00:36:56,800 -What we do with suffering, 491 00:36:57,520 --> 00:36:59,440 of the meaning given to it. 492 00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:03,480 Most human beings leave themselves immediately 493 00:37:03,800 --> 00:37:06,720 overcome by fear, despair, hostility, 494 00:37:07,040 --> 00:37:08,040 hatred 495 00:37:08,120 --> 00:37:10,080 and it ends up swallowing them up. 496 00:37:11,760 --> 00:37:12,840 -But... 497 00:37:14,200 --> 00:37:16,320 we can't blame them. 498 00:37:16,520 --> 00:37:18,160 -No. Of course not. 499 00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:20,400 But... 500 00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:24,160 if life is no longer made only fear and hatred, 501 00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:29,320 can we still call it a life? 502 00:37:31,400 --> 00:37:32,560 -I don't know. 503 00:37:35,040 --> 00:37:36,720 But shouldn't life 504 00:37:37,040 --> 00:37:38,560 come before everything else? 505 00:37:41,200 --> 00:37:42,400 -Not always. 506 00:37:46,640 --> 00:37:50,480 -Okay. But how do you manage suffering? 507 00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:53,440 -I don't always succeed either. 508 00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:56,560 I sometimes moments of despair, 509 00:37:57,320 --> 00:38:00,320 but I try to remember that the most important 510 00:38:00,520 --> 00:38:03,120 is my reaction in the face of suffering. 511 00:38:04,000 --> 00:38:05,720 It makes all the difference. 512 00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:11,160 Because I still have freedom to choose how to respond. 513 00:38:15,240 --> 00:38:17,280 It's obvious, I know it, 514 00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:19,720 but this thought always brings me 515 00:38:21,120 --> 00:38:22,880 a real feeling of freedom. 516 00:38:26,320 --> 00:38:27,320 Do you understand? 517 00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:29,440 -I believe. 518 00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:30,640 Yes. 519 00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:34,200 -It matches what I read about the cell I'm going to. 520 00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:38,680 - The prayer cell? - Yes. That's it. 521 00:38:39,880 --> 00:38:43,240 When I can concentrate and abandon me, 522 00:38:47,480 --> 00:38:49,880 it's crazy, but I feel safe, 523 00:38:52,040 --> 00:38:53,080 invulnerable, 524 00:38:56,400 --> 00:38:58,880 because there is a part of me, there, 525 00:39:00,000 --> 00:39:01,160 a core 526 00:39:03,040 --> 00:39:04,880 that no one can take me. 527 00:39:06,520 --> 00:39:10,080 Even if one day I had to lose everything, I would be left with this. 528 00:39:11,120 --> 00:39:12,240 I would be left... 529 00:39:12,960 --> 00:39:14,280 I would be left with me, 530 00:39:15,480 --> 00:39:16,720 whatever happens. 531 00:39:19,600 --> 00:39:21,440 -All right. So you mean... 532 00:39:23,000 --> 00:39:24,760 you mean that this core 533 00:39:26,840 --> 00:39:28,600 -You know, it's not... 534 00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:33,760 It's very difficult for me to be able to talk about it. 535 00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:37,680 Especially with you. 536 00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:40,200 -For what ? Because it concerns God? 537 00:39:40,400 --> 00:39:41,400 -Yes. 538 00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:42,880 -Well, maybe 539 00:39:44,080 --> 00:39:47,120 that it's the right time so that we can finally talk about it. 540 00:39:49,360 --> 00:39:50,360 No ? 541 00:39:53,400 --> 00:39:54,800 -If. 542 00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:57,400 -Because... 543 00:39:58,840 --> 00:40:01,240 me, what I have hard to understand, 544 00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:05,040 what is it like for you, among all those around me, 545 00:40:05,240 --> 00:40:08,520 you have come to believe in God. I admit that it escapes me. 546 00:40:09,320 --> 00:40:12,240 -I admit to you that I just came to start getting used to it. 547 00:40:12,560 --> 00:40:16,360 I too, sometimes find that the word "God" is primitive. 548 00:40:17,320 --> 00:40:20,560 It's far from being a word easy to use for me. 549 00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:24,600 It would rather be... 550 00:40:26,800 --> 00:40:28,480 a metaphor. 551 00:40:30,960 --> 00:40:31,960 -All right. 552 00:40:34,800 --> 00:40:35,800 -It's... 553 00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:38,320 It's as if there was... 554 00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:41,960 as if there was a hole 555 00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:44,200 in me. 556 00:40:44,880 --> 00:40:46,080 A deep hole. 557 00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:49,200 A hole where I take refuge. 558 00:40:51,520 --> 00:40:55,160 And sometimes it's full of stones and earth, 559 00:40:57,280 --> 00:41:00,480 so I have to dig, that I do the cleaning. 560 00:41:01,040 --> 00:41:02,600 And after I did all that, 561 00:41:02,800 --> 00:41:04,920 I find something deep inside me. 562 00:41:06,920 --> 00:41:08,200 And that's it 563 00:41:09,720 --> 00:41:11,240 whom I call "God". 564 00:41:14,560 --> 00:41:15,960 -But listening to you, 565 00:41:16,160 --> 00:41:18,640 it's still more just a metaphor. 566 00:41:20,040 --> 00:41:22,440 You pray to him, this God. You talk to him. 567 00:41:24,880 --> 00:41:26,920 -Yes. Very often. 568 00:41:27,440 --> 00:41:28,840 -So it's something 569 00:41:29,160 --> 00:41:31,040 that exists outside of you. 570 00:41:31,240 --> 00:41:32,240 -No, 571 00:41:32,440 --> 00:41:33,440 because... 572 00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:35,920 when I speak 573 00:41:36,120 --> 00:41:38,480 with what is found deep inside me, 574 00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:41,320 it's rather like a conversation. 575 00:41:44,320 --> 00:41:45,600 Yes. Sometimes... 576 00:41:47,360 --> 00:41:49,800 it's very childish, what I tell him. 577 00:41:50,080 --> 00:41:53,080 “Seriously, God. It's good. That's enough." 578 00:41:53,280 --> 00:41:54,320 But... 579 00:41:56,720 --> 00:41:58,120 even in these cases, 580 00:41:58,960 --> 00:42:03,040 it's like I'm swapping too with a part of myself. 581 00:42:04,080 --> 00:42:07,240 It's like it's myself that I implored 582 00:42:07,720 --> 00:42:11,040 and then, I listened to my inner voice. 583 00:42:11,240 --> 00:42:13,840 It can get me through for an enlightened one, 584 00:42:14,040 --> 00:42:15,240 but that's it. 585 00:42:16,800 --> 00:42:18,480 I learned to listen 586 00:42:19,720 --> 00:42:21,200 my inner voice. 587 00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:27,200 -It's not an improbable period 588 00:42:27,520 --> 00:42:29,280 to start believing in God, 589 00:42:29,480 --> 00:42:32,520 with the atrocities that are happening? - No. Exactly. 590 00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:35,560 It's... - You don't think that if he existed, 591 00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:39,280 he should first exterminate these barbarians? 592 00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:41,000 -Klaas, please. 593 00:42:41,320 --> 00:42:43,280 Don't reduce it to something 594 00:42:43,600 --> 00:42:44,720 so childish. 595 00:42:46,040 --> 00:42:48,600 It is not about of an old gentleman in the sky 596 00:42:48,800 --> 00:42:52,160 who must be accountable to us about what is going wrong. 597 00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:56,600 Besides, it should even be rather the opposite. 598 00:42:58,120 --> 00:43:00,400 It is we who owe him 599 00:43:00,600 --> 00:43:03,960 for all the atrocities committed in the world. 600 00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:05,320 -Who is that, “us”? 601 00:43:05,640 --> 00:43:07,000 -Human beings. 602 00:43:07,200 --> 00:43:08,840 You, me, all of us. 603 00:43:09,160 --> 00:43:12,400 -Can you explain to me? What am I supposed to answer for? 604 00:43:14,240 --> 00:43:16,200 -From your hatred, to begin with. 605 00:43:17,600 --> 00:43:20,600 Because it contributes to what is happening at the moment. 606 00:43:20,800 --> 00:43:21,800 -Oh yes ? 607 00:43:21,960 --> 00:43:23,680 Hate is legitimate. 608 00:43:24,000 --> 00:43:25,320 -And that's the problem. 609 00:43:26,480 --> 00:43:28,520 Human beings let themselves be caught 610 00:43:28,720 --> 00:43:30,760 by their fantasies of revenge. 611 00:43:31,080 --> 00:43:34,040 -I take pleasure in feeding my revenge fantasies. 612 00:43:34,360 --> 00:43:36,600 I would even go elsewhere until saying 613 00:43:38,160 --> 00:43:39,320 that it's natural. 614 00:43:39,640 --> 00:43:42,240 -It's also natural what is an illness. 615 00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:45,440 You don't see that it poisons your soul? 616 00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:48,520 -The only thing which is unnatural, 617 00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:51,560 It’s your resistance to all that. You, you... 618 00:43:51,760 --> 00:43:53,520 - Klaas... - Listen to me. 619 00:43:53,840 --> 00:43:56,400 -Klaas, do you remember the way 620 00:43:56,720 --> 00:43:58,800 which you got carried away with at the Rijksmuseum? 621 00:44:00,360 --> 00:44:03,920 It wasn't a bit out of place, with everything that's going on? 622 00:44:04,120 --> 00:44:05,120 -No. 623 00:44:06,760 --> 00:44:09,800 -He's on his way to do without terrible things, 624 00:44:10,000 --> 00:44:13,120 almost demonic, of biblical magnitude. 625 00:44:14,280 --> 00:44:16,120 All this resentment and swearing, 626 00:44:16,320 --> 00:44:18,040 Doesn’t that seem ridiculous to you? 627 00:44:18,360 --> 00:44:20,320 -No, because it's totally... 628 00:44:20,520 --> 00:44:22,960 There is nothing more natural. 629 00:44:24,600 --> 00:44:26,200 -Hate is not in your nature. 630 00:44:26,520 --> 00:44:28,160 -But my nature has changed. 631 00:44:29,320 --> 00:44:32,760 Everyone's nature has changed, because of these monsters. 632 00:44:32,960 --> 00:44:34,960 -They are not monsters. 633 00:44:35,280 --> 00:44:39,320 They are human beings. And that's precisely the problem. 634 00:44:40,160 --> 00:44:43,120 What pushes them to these horrors, we also have it in us. 635 00:44:43,320 --> 00:44:44,560 We are all humans. 636 00:44:45,160 --> 00:44:48,000 - I don't agree. - I'm convinced of it. 637 00:44:49,520 --> 00:44:51,280 I can say with certainty 638 00:44:53,280 --> 00:44:54,280 that we should all 639 00:44:54,480 --> 00:44:56,840 take a moment to look into us 640 00:44:57,840 --> 00:45:01,880 and instead of fantasizing on the annihilation of the other, 641 00:45:02,640 --> 00:45:05,200 we should try to destroy this part of us. 642 00:45:05,520 --> 00:45:08,280 - I can't listen to this. - I know what it looks like. 643 00:45:08,600 --> 00:45:10,040 I'm not lecturing you. 644 00:45:10,360 --> 00:45:11,960 -It looks like it, though. 645 00:45:12,280 --> 00:45:13,560 -I assure you, Klaas. 646 00:45:13,760 --> 00:45:16,800 You always refused to reduce the rest of humanity 647 00:45:17,000 --> 00:45:19,080 to a shapeless, faceless mass. 648 00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:22,520 - That's not what it's about. - You should think about it. 649 00:45:26,720 --> 00:45:28,800 There are numerous german mothers 650 00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:31,080 who cry 651 00:45:31,280 --> 00:45:33,440 or several sons killed on the front 652 00:45:35,400 --> 00:45:38,120 and children who have just lost their father. 653 00:45:41,200 --> 00:45:43,560 You really don't feel their pain? 654 00:45:47,000 --> 00:45:48,880 -Good. Where are you going with this? 655 00:45:50,720 --> 00:45:52,000 “Love your enemy”? 656 00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:55,040 We always come to the Christian religion. 657 00:45:55,360 --> 00:45:56,880 -The Christian religion... 658 00:45:58,920 --> 00:46:00,120 or Buddhist 659 00:46:00,840 --> 00:46:01,840 or Jewish... 660 00:46:03,160 --> 00:46:04,160 no importance. 661 00:46:04,400 --> 00:46:06,560 -If. It matters. 662 00:46:07,600 --> 00:46:10,360 From the moment where you enter yourself 663 00:46:10,560 --> 00:46:13,080 in this world of beliefs and faith, 664 00:46:13,280 --> 00:46:16,120 and that this faith becomes more important than your life... 665 00:46:16,440 --> 00:46:18,160 -You know nothing about my faith. 666 00:46:18,480 --> 00:46:20,480 -No, but I see where it will take you. 667 00:46:20,800 --> 00:46:23,240 - It has nothing to do with my faith. - Your inner voice. 668 00:46:29,400 --> 00:46:30,400 And... 669 00:46:32,840 --> 00:46:35,640 at this moment, your inner voice tells you... 670 00:46:37,920 --> 00:46:39,800 She tells you to go to camp. 671 00:46:46,200 --> 00:46:48,120 -You reduce this to something simplistic, 672 00:46:51,000 --> 00:46:53,800 but in principle, yes, that's a bit like it. 673 00:46:54,880 --> 00:46:58,120 -Even if obeying this voice involves dying? 674 00:47:09,040 --> 00:47:11,000 -I have something to tell you. 675 00:47:12,200 --> 00:47:15,440 But you have to promise me not to take it the wrong way. 676 00:47:18,920 --> 00:47:20,040 -All right. 677 00:47:24,320 --> 00:47:25,600 -It often happens to me 678 00:47:27,120 --> 00:47:29,120 to have the impression 679 00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:31,560 to be done with this life. 680 00:47:37,800 --> 00:47:41,280 - Can you specify? - That doesn't mean I'm giving up. 681 00:47:41,480 --> 00:47:42,480 -It looks like it. 682 00:47:42,680 --> 00:47:44,400 -That's why I'm asking you... 683 00:47:44,720 --> 00:47:47,800 -What does that mean? “to be done with this life”? 684 00:47:49,760 --> 00:47:51,800 -That the possibility of my disappearance 685 00:47:52,480 --> 00:47:54,800 is now part of my life. 686 00:47:58,080 --> 00:47:59,480 I would even go so far as to say 687 00:47:59,800 --> 00:48:02,320 that death enriches my existence. 688 00:48:03,800 --> 00:48:05,600 Today I can watch it 689 00:48:06,560 --> 00:48:09,280 and accept whether it is a possibility, 690 00:48:09,480 --> 00:48:11,080 accept it, instead... 691 00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:15,480 to waste my energy in fear and denial. 692 00:48:17,680 --> 00:48:19,000 At least, I try. 693 00:48:23,640 --> 00:48:26,840 -You say you're no longer afraid to die. Is that it? 694 00:48:28,560 --> 00:48:30,840 -It’s precisely the opposite. 695 00:48:33,360 --> 00:48:34,400 In fact, I... 696 00:48:36,080 --> 00:48:37,080 very... 697 00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:40,120 very much want to continue living, 698 00:48:42,680 --> 00:48:46,280 but I want to live in a way that feels right to me. 699 00:48:49,200 --> 00:48:51,600 I want to do so many things. 700 00:48:54,240 --> 00:48:56,880 I have a lot of things to bring 701 00:48:57,080 --> 00:48:59,560 to people who have lost hope. 702 00:48:59,880 --> 00:49:02,240 -You can continue to do that from here. 703 00:49:02,840 --> 00:49:06,080 -I want to belong in the world after the war. 704 00:49:07,520 --> 00:49:10,560 I really want to see what comes next. 705 00:49:12,880 --> 00:49:14,080 I am convinced 706 00:49:14,280 --> 00:49:16,760 that many people will invest 707 00:49:16,960 --> 00:49:19,240 to bring a positive change. 708 00:49:21,400 --> 00:49:22,680 I want to be part of it. 709 00:49:22,880 --> 00:49:23,920 -Exactly ! 710 00:49:24,960 --> 00:49:26,400 You have to stay. 711 00:49:28,040 --> 00:49:31,920 You're right. You have lots of things to offer to the world, 712 00:49:32,120 --> 00:49:34,320 so why do you want to leave in a place... 713 00:49:34,640 --> 00:49:37,880 -I can offer these things to the people who are there. 714 00:49:38,760 --> 00:49:39,760 Even more. 715 00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:41,000 -If you don't die. 716 00:49:43,320 --> 00:49:44,320 -Yes. 717 00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:48,720 But even if I couldn't to survive, 718 00:49:51,440 --> 00:49:53,880 sometimes, the way we die 719 00:49:56,200 --> 00:49:58,640 can also bring something in the world. 720 00:50:03,800 --> 00:50:05,320 -Please, Etty, 721 00:50:05,960 --> 00:50:07,960 I beg you, don't go. 722 00:50:09,240 --> 00:50:11,720 I would like to continue to discuss with you 723 00:50:11,920 --> 00:50:14,560 so I beg you... - Klaas, don't do that. 724 00:50:14,880 --> 00:50:17,240 -Stay one week and we will decide later. 725 00:50:17,560 --> 00:50:19,120 -I have already made my decision. 726 00:50:19,440 --> 00:50:20,840 -But it's absurd, 727 00:50:21,600 --> 00:50:24,000 since you have a choice. - Exactly. 728 00:50:24,960 --> 00:50:26,760 -It is not to the detriment of no one. 729 00:50:27,080 --> 00:50:28,680 -You are completely wrong. 730 00:50:28,880 --> 00:50:30,000 Every week, 731 00:50:30,200 --> 00:50:32,240 there is a quota of people who remain. 732 00:50:32,840 --> 00:50:34,840 He who has the choice to stay knows 733 00:50:35,160 --> 00:50:37,640 that someone should leave in his place. 734 00:50:37,840 --> 00:50:41,280 I refuse to impose that on anyone. - But that has nothing to do with it. 735 00:50:42,720 --> 00:50:44,800 We have to do everything to survive. 736 00:50:45,120 --> 00:50:46,760 -Let me ask you. 737 00:50:46,960 --> 00:50:49,560 What difference it can make that I stay 738 00:50:49,760 --> 00:50:51,320 when so many others are deported? 739 00:50:51,640 --> 00:50:54,560 -I've never heard such absurd reasoning. 740 00:50:54,760 --> 00:50:55,760 -For what ? 741 00:50:57,040 --> 00:50:59,160 -Because quite simply I know... 742 00:50:59,480 --> 00:51:00,480 -It's so arrogant 743 00:51:00,600 --> 00:51:03,200 to believe me too well to suffer this fate. 744 00:51:03,520 --> 00:51:04,560 -What are you talking about? 745 00:51:04,880 --> 00:51:07,720 -It's a thing what we call “common destiny”. 746 00:51:08,040 --> 00:51:11,720 You've heard about it. I'm doing this out of solidarity. 747 00:51:11,920 --> 00:51:15,880 That speaks to you, right? Do you know what socialism is? 748 00:51:16,320 --> 00:51:19,280 -Fuck socialism. 749 00:51:19,920 --> 00:51:23,000 If I have to choose between you and socialism is obvious 750 00:51:23,320 --> 00:51:24,800 that I choose you. 751 00:51:27,840 --> 00:51:28,960 -No. 752 00:51:29,920 --> 00:51:30,920 No. 753 00:51:31,880 --> 00:51:33,280 It's not at all. 754 00:51:42,440 --> 00:51:43,440 -How are you ? 755 00:51:44,280 --> 00:51:45,320 -Yes. 756 00:51:47,640 --> 00:51:49,640 I think we should stop there. 757 00:51:52,360 --> 00:51:54,600 We're done, anyway. - No. 758 00:51:56,160 --> 00:51:57,480 I would like to continue. 759 00:51:58,360 --> 00:51:59,800 Read some more. 760 00:52:00,000 --> 00:52:01,440 -I have to return to Amsterdam. 761 00:52:01,760 --> 00:52:02,920 -For what ? 762 00:52:03,240 --> 00:52:05,360 -I have to come see Spier at the hospital. 763 00:52:05,680 --> 00:52:06,880 -That's enough now. 764 00:52:08,120 --> 00:52:11,080 - Please let me go. - Listen to me. 765 00:52:11,400 --> 00:52:13,760 You are going to die and you know it. - Stop. 766 00:52:14,080 --> 00:52:17,080 - Why are you doing this? - You still don't understand. 767 00:52:17,400 --> 00:52:19,200 -No, I don't understand. 768 00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:22,400 How do you want me to understand? I don't recognize you anymore. 769 00:52:22,720 --> 00:52:24,440 -That's it. You don't know me anymore. 770 00:52:25,720 --> 00:52:29,360 - Listen to me, Etty. That's enough. - Let me go right now. 771 00:52:32,360 --> 00:52:40,360 ... 772 00:53:06,880 --> 00:53:08,680 - Etty... - No. 773 00:53:09,800 --> 00:53:11,760 Erase what we recorded. 774 00:53:12,960 --> 00:53:13,960 -Stop. 775 00:53:18,160 --> 00:53:19,560 Feverish breathing 776 00:53:19,760 --> 00:53:27,760 ... 777 00:53:28,000 --> 00:53:29,160 Don't go. 778 00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:33,840 -Let me pass. 779 00:53:38,440 --> 00:53:39,560 Raffut 780 00:53:39,880 --> 00:53:41,080 -Etty! 781 00:53:41,280 --> 00:53:42,640 Hey... 782 00:53:42,960 --> 00:53:44,240 Etty... 783 00:53:45,960 --> 00:53:48,120 Hey! Do you hear me? 784 00:53:49,520 --> 00:53:50,520 Etty... 785 00:53:52,400 --> 00:53:53,400 Hey... 786 00:53:54,600 --> 00:53:55,640 Are you okay? 787 00:53:58,880 --> 00:54:00,520 -What happened? 788 00:54:02,080 --> 00:54:03,280 -You passed out. 789 00:54:05,400 --> 00:54:07,880 Do you want to see a doctor? 790 00:54:08,080 --> 00:54:09,880 -No. How are you. It's good. 791 00:54:13,160 --> 00:54:14,320 -Gently. 792 00:54:19,120 --> 00:54:20,120 How are you ? 793 00:54:26,560 --> 00:54:28,480 Get up. I've got you. - Wait. 794 00:54:28,800 --> 00:54:29,800 -What ? 795 00:54:30,600 --> 00:54:32,560 Regurgitation 796 00:54:32,760 --> 00:54:33,760 What is it? 797 00:54:34,080 --> 00:54:39,160 ... 798 00:54:43,280 --> 00:54:51,280 ... 799 00:55:03,840 --> 00:55:04,840 Hold. 800 00:55:10,120 --> 00:55:11,160 How are you ? 801 00:55:28,760 --> 00:55:30,440 -I think I'm pregnant. 802 00:55:34,760 --> 00:55:35,760 -What ? 803 00:55:38,240 --> 00:55:39,320 -I am pregnant. 804 00:55:39,520 --> 00:55:41,280 Disturbing music 805 00:55:41,600 --> 00:55:47,880 ... 806 00:56:26,640 --> 00:56:30,960 SME subtitling: VECTRACOM